Evite? Yes it Does Cause Anxiety!

Free invitations to parties, weddings, or even a bris! How could that make you anxious, you ask?

Were you aware that when you "view invitation" the author of the evite knows you opened it? If you're just like me you want to "view" the date, time and prospective attendees before mulling it over and providing a yay or nay response. This is where it gets anxious...

Now you've opened the invitation. You plan on spending the next few days deciding if you can stomach the crowd. But the author is now fuming that you've seen the invitation but haven't yet responded-- "What kind of a person has to *think* about coming to my party?"

You. You're that kind of person.

And as every day passes you remind yourself you should respond, but instead you forget, go to bed, wake up, forget, remind... the evite cycle continues. You will forever be the bad guy until you click "yay."

Now that's what I call evitexiety!

I Like You, But Not That Much

Meeting new people is quaint. A shake of hands, an introduction, often a few words about work, pets, kids.

Why it doesn't end there, I'll never know.

What I do know is the simple task of leaving my house inevitably leads me to meet someone during the course of the day who will ask for my email address. To my horror, often attempt to punch in my number.

They seemingly want to hang out, invite me to a dinner party, or most recently, "game night."

Hanging out with strangers makes me anxious. Eating other people's food causes me anxiety. And "game night," well, that's enough to pop a valium just to get through the thought of it.

Today make yourself a promise to cross paths with a zealous stranger and chat them up. I guarantee you that your boredom will increase your heart rate as you desperately search for a way out of the conversation.

Recommendations? Bah!

I have a ton of friends. At least four. And I like 'em.

Here's where it all goes wrong in such a way that your universe too can be subjected to what I call: Recommending Anxiety.

How to do it:

Step 1) Friend asks, "Yo, you know of a good mechanic (or hairdresser, handyman, therapist)?"

Step 2) Reply, "Sure. Try so and so. Wait, I even have their number in my phone!"

Step 3) You just wait. Life is about to get way more anxious.

You will inevitably be with your mechanic, or stylist, or handywho when that professional tells you that your friend was displeased with their work. Perhaps there was even an argument. You will then go to said friend and ask what happened, only to be tormented by an earful of bullcrap about what a terrible recommendation you made.

Follow steps 1-3 for this afternoon's dose of anxiety.